Australian Politics Collective Noun Glossary

What a week it’s been: the past seven days have shown me how bone ignorant most punters are on stuff that actually matters. Point in case is the collective noun. Most people know it’s a school of fish or herd of cattle, but beyond that their slack jaws loosen that little bit more.

Therefore, it’s time for some more widespread altruism with the publication of the Australian Politics Collective Noun Glossary below. It’s for any decent member of the public who doesn’t understand this stuff – and News Limited journalists if they ask permission first.

Part 1: The Electorate

A waft of activists

A prim of senior citizens

A burnout of bogans

A seek of business people

Part 2: Party Politics

A gag of Liberals (anything left of Joe Hockey)

A scum of Liberals (anything right of Joe Hockey)

A superlative of the ALP Left

A sussex of the ALP Right

An excrement of Greens

A dim of Nationals

A punch-line of Family First supporters

Part 3: The Parliament

A whine of staffers

An apathy of school kids

A swill of Senators (if they’re Liberals)

A flop of Members

Part 4: The Media

A coven of News Limited journalists

A flatulence of tabloid journalists

A commune of ABC journalists

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There you go – feel free to add any others I’ve missed.

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